¿Es Machismo?

I have been studying Spanish the last few weeks at a school in Buenos Aires. The first three weeks I was in a class with an early twenty something teacher and a late twenty something student, Alemania. Being the only guy in the class was not a big deal, even if the conversation occasionally ran to how awful men are, the many problems men have and the like. Typical role playing exercises to practice our Spanish consisted of situations where I was a creepy guy on the subway trying to get Alemania to go out with me or where Alemania was the boss and I was a lazy worker who needed to be reprimanded.

I would sit patiently in class and listen when the conversation would turn to communism and how wonderful Che was. That degenerated to near farce one day when Alemania expressed amazement that Maradona had tattoos of both Fidel and Che. Those two are so different! How could he possibly have both? Despite his many skills as a soccer player, perhaps Maradona isn’t versed in the finer points of communist revolutionary thought. Now, if he had both Stalin and Trotsky, that would be a different story!

I, however, could not sit still and listen to discussions like how all Italians are fascists. Um, what? Apparently it is true. How could I be so ignorant of the truth? That debate got a little heated. What finally caused me to reach for my heaviest Ingles-Español Diccionario was when we started talking about what a utopia France (?!?) is and the wonders of the French government. That, my friends, is a bridge too far. I don’t need a million workers in the streets protesting the economic conditions or riots in Paris in both 2005 and 2007 to let me know that perhaps not everyone loves the current French regime. I think I can safely say that while Argentina has many problems, no society is perfect. Enough on this topic.

Today, after spending yesterday celebrating San Martin Day, I started private classes. August is an extremely slow month in Buenos Aires and, given the dearth of students and fact that Alemania has left our school, I was put in private classes for the week. Great. No problem.

After exchanging pleasantries with my new teacher, we began class. The first question, "¿Que es machismo?" For those that don’t understand, she is asking me to describe machismo. Machismo is this stereotype that Argentine men think they must constantly prove their courage, are superior to women and should, generally, treat women like objects.

After discussing this idea for a little while, she shuffled through her papers and pulled one out. It was a quiz entitled, “¿Es Machismo?” The quiz included things like, “If a man sees a women that he doesn’t know on the street and makes passes at her, is it machismo?” Um, I guess so. Or perhaps something like, “There exists many more forms of contraception for women than men, is this machismo?” Uh, I’m going to say no to that one for now, but I will have to think about it. After completing the exam, I hope successfully, we moved on.

Her: Does San Francisco have a problem with machismo?

Me: We have many problems in San Francisco, but I don’t think a preponderance of machismo is one of them.

And so on.

Finally, we came to the grammar portion of our class. Uses of the present subjunctive tense. For this another paper appeared from the stack and we began.

¿Que quieren las mujeres de los hombres? Or, what do women want from men? We then went through and reviewed a list of, I kid you not, 41 items related to what women want from men, making sure that I understood both the vocabulary and conjugation of the subjunctive in each one. If I didn’t have someone who currently holds my heart, I might have left there in despair about what a worthless wretch I am. Oh, why do I occasionally reek of booze? How could I have been so insensitive as to have gone out with the boys? Of course your mother is a perfect pearl and I love spending time with her!

I won't speak perfect Spanish by the time I leave BA, but I should be a perfect gentleman.